What Happens at a Custody Conciliation Conference in Pennsylvania

You filed your custody complaint, served the papers, and now you have a date for something called a "conciliation conference." If you are picturing a courtroom with a judge, a witness stand, and objections — that is not what this is. The conciliation conference is the first real step in most Pennsylvania custody cases, and understanding what happens there takes a significant amount of anxiety off the table.

What a Conciliation Conference Is

The conciliation conference is a meeting facilitated by a custody conference officer or master — a trained professional who works for the court but is not a judge. The purpose is to see whether the parties can reach an agreement on custody without going to trial.

The conference usually takes place in a conference room at the courthouse, not in a formal courtroom. The officer meets with both sides, hears each person's position, and works to find common ground. In many counties, the officer meets with each party separately first, then brings everyone together.

This is not an adversarial hearing. No testimony is taken under oath. No evidence is formally admitted. The conference officer is trying to facilitate a resolution, not make a ruling.

How to Prepare

Even though the conference is informal compared to a trial, preparation matters. Bring:

• Copies of everything you filed — your Custody Complaint, Form 3 (Criminal Record and Abuse History Verification), and proof of service
• Government-issued photo ID
• A summary of your proposed custody arrangement — be specific about what you are asking for (sole legal, sole physical, shared, specific schedule)
• Supporting documentation — school records showing the child's enrollment under your care, medical records, photos of the child's living space, any communications with the parent documenting their absence or agreement
• A caregiving timeline — dates when the child came into your care, what triggered the change, and what you have been providing since

Do not bring the child unless the court asks. Under Pa.R.C.P. 1915.11, children are generally not permitted at conciliation conferences unless the judge orders it or the custody conference officer requests it.

What the Officer Can and Cannot Do

The custody conference officer can:

• Propose interim custody arrangements
• Draft a consent order if both sides agree
• Recommend that the case move to mediation or trial
• Set a temporary schedule while the case is pending

The officer cannot:

• Issue a final custody order — only a judge can do that
• Force either party to agree to anything
• Give legal advice to either side
• Make findings about standing or best interest

If both parties reach an agreement at the conference, the officer drafts a proposed consent order and submits it to the judge. The judge reviews the agreement against the § 5328 best-interest factors before signing. A consent order has the same legal force as an order issued after trial.

If You Cannot Agree

When the conference does not produce an agreement, the case moves forward through the county's custody process, which typically includes:

1. Mandatory co-parenting education — most counties require both parties to complete a parenting education program, even in grandparent cases
2. Mediation — some counties require or strongly encourage mediation before trial
3. Pre-trial conference — a more formal meeting where each side presents their evidence and witness lists to the assigned judge
4. Custody trial — a full evidentiary hearing where testimony is taken under oath, evidence is formally admitted, and the judge makes a determination based on the 14 statutory factors under § 5328

The gap between the conciliation conference and trial can be weeks or months, depending on the county's caseload. During this period, whatever temporary arrangement was established at the conference — or by the court — remains in effect.

Tips for the Conference

Be calm and factual. The conference officer is evaluating both parties' reasonableness and cooperation, not just the merits of the case. A grandparent who presents facts clearly and shows willingness to work with the system makes a stronger impression than one who is visibly angry or confrontational.

Know what you want. Vague requests ("I want what's best for the child") are less useful than specific proposals ("I am requesting sole physical and sole legal custody, with the parent having supervised visitation every other Saturday").

Do not badmouth the parent. Focus on the child's needs, not the parent's failures. The officer has seen thousands of cases and responds to specific concerns about child safety, not emotional characterizations.

Bring a support person if your county allows it. Some counties permit a non-party support person to accompany you to the waiting area, though they typically cannot participate in the conference itself.

Our Pennsylvania Guardianship and Custody Court Process Guide includes a hearing preparation organizer with a document checklist specifically designed for the conciliation conference.

Frequently Asked Questions

Can I bring a lawyer to the conciliation conference?

Yes. If you have an attorney, they can attend and participate. If you are representing yourself, you are not at a disadvantage in the conference setting — the officer facilitates the discussion for both sides equally.

What if the other party does not show up?

The next step depends on the county's procedures and the court's direction. Contact the court administrator or legal aid to find out how the missed conference will be handled.

Is the conciliation conference confidential?

Do not assume statements made during a conference are confidential or automatically inadmissible at trial. Check your county's local rules or ask the court administrator before sharing sensitive information.

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